Thursday, March 15, 2012

Everyone is an asshole when I'm sick, which makes me an asshole as well.

The swine flu/ebolla/rabies is still going strong. I took my only sick day yesterday and my husband was an asshole all day and wouldn't let me sleep. He kept running in and out of the house, making the dogs bark like hell and waking me up. I asked him not to, but he doesn't listen to me. Because he is an asshole.

He picked Lu up early (another asshole move) and she decided to act like an asshole also. Turning the light on, waking me up to ask me where the water is (the water, for fuck's sake, is in the faucet where it always is) and just overall bothering the bejesus out of me.

I am very cranky when I'm sick, but not if I'm left alone. Here are some examples of why I was as mean as a stepped on rattlesnake last night. Each one of these times he woke me up to say this shit. 

Dickhead Todd: Are you hungry? I'm hungry, why don't you get up and fix us something to eat.

Dickhead Todd: I need a haircut sometime tonight.

Dickhead Todd: You asleep?

Dickhead Todd: You awake? You still sick?

Dickhead Todd: That laundry isn't going to do itself, you know! 

Let's not forget when he started the weed eater in front of the open bedroom window. He just wanted to "see if it worked". That is the kind of dickery he pulls. After that I told him that if I had the strength to pick up a ball bat I would hit him with it. He acted like he had NO idea why I should be mad.

I can't wait until he is sick. I'm going to start a one woman band with pots and pans, harmonica, drums, bells and a pitch pipe. I'll play it all night long, like Lionel Richie, baby.

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